The show starts out with all the guys trying to figure out who has the longest beard, which then turns into about the funniest part of the show... The beard jokes. Martin lets us all know that a beard joke is the equivalent of a "your momma" joke.
As best described from Uncle Si's mouth:
- Your beard is so fat not even Dora will explore it.
- Your beard is so ugly that when you try to take a bath the water jump right out of it.
- Your beard is so stupid it took two hours to watch 60 minutes.
- Your beard is so hairy you look like chewbacca.
- Your beard is so dumb it sits on the TV and watches the couch.
We then see how Phil can use the grandchildren to do some house chores when they stop by. He really does deserve Grandfather of the Year! He has found a way to get the kids to do stuff without even asking them to do it.
When then see the boys leave work early... Again, so go finish covering a blind so they can hunt the following day. At this point we get a few more of Si's quotes of the year...
"A superhero can't reveal his secrets" "I'm like Victoria, shes got secrets and so do I"
Side track... Have you seen the Harlem Shake video with these guys??
Where have all of these people been?? There are 20 people I have never seen before. Do they just hind when filming is taking place- Get the two weeks off during filming? Are we to believe that Duck Commander is a five man team? Regardless I'm still watching.
Lastly, we get to see Godwin try to act like a panther. Jase tries to prove a point to Si about how things farther away just look darker than they are close up. Si doesn't believe it is possible, which is where we all get the pleasure of another Vietnam story about how he was called Crazy Eyes, because he could see 'crazy good.'
The second episode of the night is about deer hunting for the ladies! Jep lets us all know right away that his wife Jessica killed a deer... and not with her car! We also learn that Jep is not very good a sharing.
Anyways the episode mostly surrounds the story of Jase and Willie trying to get Missy and Korie to go hunting with them. Korie tells the boys that "they let them hunt and they don't complain about it." Which of course doesn't sit well with the boys. Missy then add, "if ya'll were married to anyone else on the planet you would hear nagging and everything else." Here is a lesson for you Missy, most of American wives are in the same position as you... so you and Korie are not the only ones who let there husbands hunt. In fact, most of them already hunt on their own.
Lets just say... No one should pick Korie and Missy as a hunting partner any time soon. If there were any deer in that woods... they're all gone now. Korie and Missy were about as loud as an amusement park!
Funniest part of this episode... Korie thinks Willie is holding on to some kind of spray that she thinks she needs to spray on herself. Come to find out she sprays doe urine on herself! Oh my! Jase then lets her know to stay high if she sees a deer coming towards her and Willie adds that it will try to molest her.
Bottom line- Jase and Willie can't even finish the hunt with the girls. They take off to track a deer (or at least we are suppose to believe there is deer). They leave the girls and they don't feel the love and wonder back to the truck. There is no deer to rub in Jep face at the end of the day.
BUT here is the best part! When they get back to the house, Jep informs them that Jessica did not shoot the deer, he did! One of the best pranks/stories/lies that has ever been shown on this show.
I find it hard to believe that these couples have been married for almost 20 years and they have never been hunting together?? I have been with my fiance for 5 years and he wanted me to go hunting with him less than a year into our relationship. I feel like with these guys it would have been a right of passage just to even see if the girl was worth marrying.
More southern review next week.. if Kay makes it out of her hording sheds in time for next weeks show.
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